The Diary of Shazana Matussin

to my so called backstabbing friends

2005-08-31T10:50:00.000-07:00

Next time, be extra careful who you bitch about me to yea? Not that i care or surprised even... i mean it's quite expected from girls like you... for you guys to change would be unbelivable... shocking really.. it's just in your nature to be bitches.. so whatever right? you guys can continue bitching about me for all i care.. if bitching about me is the only way to make your lives worth living for so be it.. sad but true.. just one advice, be careful who you bitch to.. be extra careful... thank your lucky stars that i'm not the kind to do anything about it.. it's just not in my nature to backstab my friends.. or should i say, my so called friends.. i have no interest in lowering myself to your standard.. just remember, what comes around goes around...

signing out...

izan

Finally....

2005-07-22T22:09:00.000-07:00

Finally, i'm updating my blog... hehehe... It's been a while huh? I've been quite busy.. Actually, it's been very hectic.. Nevertheless, i've found a little time to post...

Ok, what's new?

- Started working at SCB
- Met new people
- Made new friends
- Lost some people
- Moved in with my dad
- New step mom

Hmmm... What else? i really can't think of what to say... There's too many things on my mind right now..

I'll update another time yea? My fries have arrived.. hehehe...

GARAGE SALE

2005-04-30T02:21:00.000-07:00

Ok.. just wanted you all to know that we're having a garage sale at our place in Lambak Kanan on Sunday 8th May 2005.. Aite? So if come if u can aite.. :P heheh... There'll b alll kinds of stuff.. No Underwear!! I swear!! Hahah.. Most the items will be around $1 - $3... So do come yea.. :p

GARAGE SALE

PLACE:

JLN 31 SPG 29 PERPINDAHAN LAMBAK KANAN

DATE:

SUNDAY 8TH MAY 2005

TIME:

2PM ONWARDS

Ok, so there'll be food, shoes, books, magazines, clothes etc... Don't worry, they're all still good.. :p

So yea, that's pretty much it.. Just come yea.. It'll be fun.. Hehehe... :o)

If you've got any questions, just tag me or txt me yea.. You guyz have my number.. Cheers!

More than words..

2005-04-11T10:30:00.000-07:00

Hmm.. ok so i havnt really bee updating this blog.. Im kinda getting sick of it.. I dunno if its the lame ass layout or just that im getting tired of writing down my daily activities.. not that their interesting or nethin.. heheh.. Or maybe im just getting too old for this kinda thing.. hmm..

I mean wut is there for me to write.. just the same old boring stuff.. So i got up this morning blah, blah, blah... n that's it? If i were lyk in some other part of the world then it'd b aite i guess.. at least there'd sumthin interestin to write.. heheh.. so yea, i guess im getting tired of it.. :p

But im still gna keep this site up.. heheh.. u noe, in case boredom attacks or sumthin.. :p

Ok, so wut have i done today? Hmmm..

Woke up, cried a little, showered, cried a little, got ready, cried a little, went out, cried a little, listened to "more than words" while driving, cried a lot.. hahaha.. corny i know! But yea i guess i can relate to that song..

There are more ways to show someone that u love them other than words.. its damn easy to say "i love u"!! Anyone can say thos three words.. i love you i love you i love u.. But to show it by your actions is worth so much more.. it dun even have to be big.. u dun hafta be so dramatic lyk they do in movies wen the guy is singing outside ur window.. Or wen the guy is chasing some girl thru the airport just to say i love u n everyone starts applauding.. ok that's lame!! i mean little things like leaving a note in my bag, or bringing me my favourite food lyk fries or salted popcorn wen u come over, or txt me in the middle of the night wen u cnt sleep just to say i miss you.. it dun have to be nethin huge.. little things are worth so much more than the most expensive things in the world.. u just have to show ur love through ur actions aswell as words.. words dun guarantee nethin.. lyk wen im moody or cry, all i really want is a hug.. that's all.. idun need him to get all moody as well... That just wont go newer.. we'd b goin round in circles..
i really dun understand y guyz dun get us girls? its pretty simple actually.. u just have to think of the little things.. read between the lines..

its really not that hard..

hmm.. so yea i guess that's all i have to say for now.. heheh... bye!!

Coffee Zone

2005-04-04T14:54:00.000-07:00

In CZ with Lidz, Farah, Nadz and my sayang Faizul.. Jz wanted to make a quick entry... heehee.. Ok i guess that'z it.. :p hehe.. at least i posted sumthin ryt? Oh, btw fee, ur such a biyatch for not tellin me ur goin 2 Uk.. Bitchy eh.. :p Heheh.. ok bye!

Just wanna try sumtin out..

2005-03-27T08:09:00.000-08:00

Ok.. im bored.. I just wanna try sumthin out.. Heheh.. i noe i noe!! Its lame!! But wutever.. U dun hafta do it if u dun want to..

Ok.. There's a secret msg here.. To find out wut it is, copy the txt, paste it in microsoft word, select all and change the font to Arial.. I'm tellin you, its sumthin really really juicy!!! Sumthin i wld never in a million years post up.. But since its in code, im not too worried since it'll take u guys sum tym to read wut it sez.. But its juicy!! Im telling u.. Read at ur own risk..

" You guys have got to be more bored than i am to actually be duin this lame ass game!!! :p hehehehe.. :p Peace!!"

Peace!

Nuthin Interestin here..

2005-03-27T06:51:00.000-08:00

Its been a while hasnt it? Ok so latest updates.. Been spending most of my time with faizul.. *sigh* :) I'm sooo happy.. He took me to a bbq at his place last nyt which was cool.. Oh, but then there's this bitch who claims that her n faizul r still 2gther which really got me upset cz i thot it was true but it turned out to be bullshit.. Ugh! She was being all bitchy to me n faizul got so pissed at her that he actually went to her office and told her to leave me alone and shit.. Such a bitch.. And she even threatened to hurt me.. Esh! Whatever..

Hmm.. Wut else? Oh! Sha's cumin back in 2 weeks which is way cool!! I sooo cant wait.. :) Im actually not feeling too well at the moment.. I duno whether its cz of the weather or from watching thailand beat the shit outta myanmar in the rain.. Whatever it is, i feel lousy.. I was spose to stay home today and get some rest but then Lidz begged me to go to the stadium with her.. So being the good friend that i am (ahem) :p, i went.. We went around for a lil while but due to the fact that it was pouring really heavily and that we were starvation central, we ended up in Coffee Zone..

So blah blah blah... Faizul then picked me and Ka dina up from home to go to our place in Lambak.. Chilled there for a lil while then dropped Ka Dina of at Abg Gman's place.. Then blah blah blah, went to the mall then back home..

So sorry for this really crappy post but lyk i sed, im not feeling to well.. So i cant really be bothered to post much.. so yea.. Nite nite! *hugz*

Insomnia

2005-03-22T00:25:00.000-08:00

Ok.. I've finally posted some very very long overdue pics.. heheh.. so u shld expect new ones in about 3 months yea..? :p hehehe... nah! ill post up some more pix as soon as i can.. heheh..

Faizul came over tonight to help me with my project.. He's so sweet.. :) I kinda miss him now actually.. hmmm...

Ok, its pretty late.. i cant sleep.. I really dunno wut to do now.. ive updated my msn, done my project, chatted to ppl, updated my friendster n my blog.. hmm.. what the hell? heheh.. how lame is that? :p

ok well i guess ill jz go now n watch the oc.. that's only if Ka Dina's done with the dvds oledi.. She wont let me watch it til she's done with them... :p

Ok nite nite.. :)

2005-03-21T07:22:00.000-08:00

Hellooo
Posted by Izan

2005-03-21T07:12:00.000-08:00

Another raya pic.. :p
Posted by Izan

2005-03-21T07:07:00.000-08:00

Sha n Z..
Posted by Izan

2005-03-21T07:01:00.000-08:00

Hi..
Posted by Izan

2005-03-21T06:57:00.000-08:00

Ozi, Muiz n Me.. :)
Posted by Izan

2005-03-21T06:54:00.000-08:00

Sending Hamdi off on my bday..
Posted by Izan

2005-03-21T06:50:00.000-08:00

another 1
Posted by Izan

2005-03-21T06:42:00.000-08:00

Raya
Posted by Izan

2005-03-21T06:37:00.000-08:00

Iyra, Dex & Me..
Posted by Izan

2005-03-21T06:35:00.000-08:00

Barbican..
Posted by Izan

2005-03-21T06:31:00.000-08:00

the 3 of us.. Brunei Hall..
Posted by Izan

2005-03-21T06:29:00.000-08:00

Oz n Me.. Brunei Hall again.. :p
Posted by Izan

2005-03-21T06:26:00.000-08:00

Muiz n Me at Brunei Hall..
Posted by Izan

2005-03-21T06:22:00.000-08:00

Hi...
Posted by Izan

2005-03-21T06:20:00.000-08:00

Hello there..
Posted by Izan

2005-03-21T06:14:00.000-08:00

Us at the beach
Posted by Izan

2005-03-21T06:04:00.000-08:00

~ Us ~
Posted by Izan

2005-03-20T05:10:00.000-08:00

London...
Posted by Izan

2005-03-20T05:06:00.000-08:00

Me n Diya in Brunei Hall..
Posted by Izan

2005-03-20T05:02:00.000-08:00

Ok, maybe just one more.. :p since it was during my bday..
Posted by Izan

2005-03-20T04:58:00.000-08:00

Overdue Raya Pic.. :p
Posted by Izan

2005-03-20T04:55:00.000-08:00

Ka Dina's Graduation...
Posted by Izan

2005-03-19T11:14:00.000-08:00

Hmmmm...
Posted by Izan

2005-03-19T11:09:00.000-08:00

New yrs...
Posted by Izan

Feeling so good..

2005-03-19T09:25:00.000-08:00

Ok, sooo i jz got back frm gdg.. Met up with a bunch of ppl who ive missing soooo much!! It feels sooo good to finally see all them again.. :) *hugz* Oh, so i met Fee's gf Aizah.. She's such a sweety!!! Really nice but a lil bitchy.. :p hahah.. My bad aizah!! Im playin.. :p Saw a lot of other people.. It felt really good to be among my friends again..

Im gna try to post up some pix now.. Heheh.. Some very overdue pix.. :p

Ill post again after that..

~250405~

2005-03-13T21:44:00.000-08:00

Jz had lunch at McD's with faizul and Azimin.. :) So yummy.. My food that is.. So anyway, i went to the hospital this morning and they found found an infection...Again! Shit... I hafta go back in 5 days.. The hospital was damn crowded! It's crazy!

Hmm... I spent the whole of yesterday afternoon by the pool at Empire.. Ka Wana had a room there for her bday which was nice.. :) Took Thuy, her boyfriend and Faizul along which was fun.. hehehe.. I felt really bad for faizul tho cz i spent more tym lying by the pool than swimming.. So he didn't wanna swim alone so he too jz lay beside me.. I told him to just swim without me but he din wanna.. So yea.. I cant spend to much tym in the pool cz i get this cold and my eyes turn red and it becomes really uncomfortable for me.. Faizul sez its cz i dun take in enough water.. But i feel so bad..

Im tryin to hook Liyana up with Faizul's friend Azimin.. heheh.. I think they'd look really cute together.. :p hehehe.. They already started txtn eachother which is soooo cute.. :) Fingers crossed for the both of them.. hehehe..

Oh yea! On the way back from Faizul's place yesterday, i got stuck in this huge jam which made me late for ka Wana's bday dinner.. Turns out there was an accident and the cars were smashed! Shit! The accident must have happened around 15 minutes before cz an fire truck passed us when we were on the way to his place.. So scary man.. And i think someone got hurt cz there were like 4 police cars, 2 fire trucks and an abulance.. And the ground was wet...

Shit! Ok im at this internet shop killing tym and this guy who is sitting next to me is talkin to me.. Ugh! He's lyk "Hi!" and i just so ignored him.. And now he's lyk staring at me.. Ugh! Im soooo uncomfortable.. And he's still tryin to talk to me.. Fuck off!

Ok so back to my story... Yea i think the ground was wet cz they had to wash the blood of the ground.. Hmm.. Ok so i dunno if this story is accurate but its just my conclusion.. :p

Shit, this guy is soooo annoying.. And lyk soooo gay! Esh!

Oh! I have new pix that im gna post up really soon.. :) Heheh... Pix from New Years till now.. I know its really late but at least im posting pix ryt? :p Shit the guy is moving closer to me.. Arrrggghhh!! I better get outta here quick!!

Ok bye!!

A lil something for Diya and Iyra

2005-03-09T22:59:00.000-08:00

So i was going through my really really really old scrapbook and i found this poem...

Leaving Our Friends

Leaving our friends isn't easy in any way,

We ask them to come back

We ask them to stay

We cant say goodbye

Or ever remember when we first said "hi!"

We had so much fun in school

It was totally cool!

We'll be friends forever

And nothing can change that..ever!

Awww!!! How sweet is that? Isn't it just the cutest little poem? And guess who wrote it? None other than me, Diya and Iyra!!! Hahahhaha!!! :p I hope they don't kill me for posting up out poem.. My bad guyz! I just couldn't help myself.. It's just so cute!! :p We wrote before the twins left Uk for good.. Hehehe..

Ok, so my car is getting washed at the moment.. It's really dirty.. Ugh! I hope it don't rain...

//Updated\\

2005-03-07T19:05:00.000-08:00

Ok ok! I'll update for all you guyz who complain i never update nemore.. :p The reason i hardly update nemore is coz there are those people who take every word i say here so seriously.. Its pretty annoying.. Those people know who they are.. Cant you guyz be a lil bit more open minded.. Seriously.. Jz relax aite n go with it.. Not everythin needs to have a reason behind it.. Hello.. Havent you ever heard of this lil thing called 'Fun'? Geez! Relax aite.. If you cant open your lil mind then you shouldn't be reading this site aite.. Or any blog for that matter.. You shouldn't take everythin so seriously aite.. That's why you guys are so stressed out.. You analyze things too much.. Chill aite? Who gives a shit what ppl think? They have no part in my life whatsoever..

Moving on.. Something made me wonder.. Why is it that if a girl has more guy friends than girl friends, she's labeled a bitch, a slut or a whatever the hell name ppl can find.. Why cant a girl just be friends with a guy and have nothing between them but friendship? Why must there be something between a guy and girl who are close? Are some ppl just so narrow minded? Unfortunately, i know a couple of people who think this way.. It's very unfortunate indeed.. I think that its really awesome for both sex to get along really well! I mean, why must it be a problem right? I love my guyz so much.. They're my buddies.. People i get along with so well! Why do i have to feel guilty for that? The only reason ppl would even think these girls sleep with her guy friends is because that's what they do or have done... I mean c'mon, why would they even think this way if they've never done it themselves ryt? So the only people who are in the wrong here are those people who have all these negative thoughts about everything in life.. Those people who think the worst of other people only think that way coz they themselves have done or are doing all those atrocious things that they claim other people do..

Hmm.. Something to think about yes..?

~ Can you please respect my privacy ~

2005-02-21T20:16:00.000-08:00

Got a new fone.. ok its not really new but its new in my life.. :) Yvonne and i swapped phones so now she has my 2100 and i have her 8250..? i think that's the model.. hahah.. and i found this really hot housing for it which is so cute!! Love it to bits now.. Even tho its an old model.. :p hehe.. But whatever.. I still love it esp with its new housing..

So Liyana set a date for just the both of us on the 7th of MArch.. Apparantely we're celebrating something but i don't know what yet.. Sez she'll tell me on that day itself.. Very cool..!! :p heheh.. Dunno what that gurl has planned for us.. heheh.. Cant wait tho.. Such a sweety that Liyana.. *hugz* :)

Missin so many people right now.. Booooo.. I miss "Mr.Lonely".. Hehehe... Can't really mention his name as i gotta protect his privacy.. heheh.. But those of you who know me well will know who i'm talkin bout.. Esp Mr.Lonely himself.. Sorry i didn't reply last night dude.. Only read ur msg this morning.. :)

Rumours by Lindsay Lohan is stuck in my head right now.. I love that song! :) Gonna get her album later after my last class.. Heheh... And i still have to renew my lisence and get my car serviced.. Shit.. And get my windscreen fixed.. I hate that fuckin crack.. Ugh! Where the fuck did that stone come from neway? Good thing daddy isn't angry.. heheh.. Wasn't my fault anyway..

So i went to JIS yesterday cz Yvonne wanted to check out the organizer.. And then to my fucking surprise, B was there!! WTF? Sed he had to send an application form or whatever.. Hmmm... Yea ok B..

So my eyes are actually getting tired ryt now.. hehehe.. Oh yea! I saw Mr.Lonely's girl yesterday.. heheh..

Ok, bye! :)

\\ || Mr. Lonely || //

2005-02-20T01:30:00.000-08:00

I don't have much to say right now.. Jz very very stressed out.. But yea wutever.. Hmm.. B's being a pain.. He really really is.. IF you're reading this i dun fuckin care aite.. Cz its true and you know it..

I'm really not feeling to well either.. My throat is really sore.. Reminds me of the time i got really sick in kb.. Shit.. It started with a sore throat which turned into a really high fever.. damn!

A ton of assignments are due 2mrw which sucks.. I so forgot all bout them..

Oh, my sister got the 2nd Season of OC! Yay! :p

Had a really really really fun Thursday night! Really really funny! Cant wait to hang out again! Hahaha.. If u decide to grow up and stop avoiding me that is.. We always have a good time when we hang out but then the next day you turn into this fuckin annoyin person who tries to act cool and avoids me.. Wut the fuck is that bout? Wutever dude.. Jz call me when ur over it aite cz im cool with everythin.. :p

There's this guy who's freaking me out! Shit... Chill aite! Take things slow.. Relax..

Well, i should really go and finish my assignments.. Bye! :)

~Happy Valentines Day~

2005-02-14T20:08:00.000-08:00

Ok first off i'd like to wish you all a very happy not mention belated Valentines Day! :) I'm sure you all have had a better day than mine..

I dun really want to say wut i did for Valentines, jz tat it wasnt how i imagined it would be.. But nevertheless, i still got to see B.. Hmm.. I dunno if thats a good thing.. But whatever..

To all those people who wished me a Happy Valentines, thanx so much.. :) *hugz* u guyz r sweet.. N to those guys who asked me to be their Valentine, thank you.. that's just so sweet of you all to ask me.. Very flattering indeed.. :)

So, im in school at the moment waiting for my next class at 1pm.. Ugh! Its so boring but i have to go since its a tutorial.. Oh! Before i forget, i'd like to congratulate my dear friend Aimi for her O'level results.. Very cool.. :)

I actually do have a lot to say but i dun think its appropriate for me to write it here.. Maybe some other day cz i still do wanna give this person another chance to prove me wrong.. So yea i wont mention anything...yet!

I'm gna c B after class later.. I hope we can actually talk coz it seems like he's avoiding the topic that i want to talk about.. Whenever i see him, we're always surrounded by people.. Mostly his friends.. And i dunno whether that's his way of avoiding talking to me or just coz he wants to be with his friends.. But then we hardly spend time together alone.. I think the most time ive spent with him alone is when we're in the car.. And when i do start to talk bout things, he gets angry which scares me.. Shit! Am i really turning into a pushover? Fuck..

Anyway, ill try to update again later..

~Bye~

Confused

2005-02-11T16:16:00.000-08:00

So B finally met my family.. N he looked so nervous which was so cute.. Heheh.. But im not too sure bout hium now.. Coz lately ive been hearing so many stories bout him but i jz dunno whether to believe them or not.. Cz sum of the stuff ive oledi heard from B himself when we jz started goin out.. N the rest is jz so hard to believe.. I've actually asked B if the stories ive heard is true and he admits to some of them but not all.. N i noe he's honest.. He's a really straight forward guy u see.. He's so straight that he sometimes actually hurts my feelings.. But its ok cz at least he's honest.. But you know, there are nicer ways of saying things.. But i guess that's just him.. He'll own up to his mistakes but wont if its not true.. So yea.. I'm just so confused.. N me being lyk insecure n all is annoying him i think.. Fuck! I really dunno wut to do.. If he did sumthin to make me feel slightly better then it'd b ok.. But no.. I asked him if the stories were true n all he sed was "believe what u want"..

That so dun help me at all.. But i really do like him.. I dun like believing things from other ppl.. I hate it! Sumtimes i dun even wanna noe.. cz it jz makes me so fuckin insecure.. N if i do hear things, i dun wanna believe them till i actually hear from the person himself..

So i guess ill jz take wut i heard into consideration and not cut him out completely.. Maybe he has done some of those stuff before but that dun mean he cant change ryt? I mean everyone's been thru sum kinda phase in life but has realized it n changed.. So yea.. Wutever.. I jz need to be really cautious is all..

Valentines is coming up.. R we gna celebrate? Hmm.. I dunno.. He hasnt mentioned nethin.. So i really dunno.. Wutever happens, happens lah.. :p

*ciao*

B

2005-01-31T20:03:00.000-08:00

Aww.. Sha ur so sweet.. :) Uve really been der for me and now its turning out better than before.. :) Everything happens for a reason.. How ppl can say such cruel things bout you, ill never noe cz uve always been so nice 2 me.. :) *hugz*

So yea, im so smitten.. *sigh* he's so everything that ive always wanted.. But im still so scared.. I really really do like him but Adi's taken away my ability to trust again.. I'm sure it'll come back eventually.. Im just being cautious.. But yea.. B is just so sweet.. He really is.. *sigh* i miss him now.. :) So happy to be with him..

I'm in school at the moment.. I have L&D after this which is so damn boring.. But it's only an hour so yea.. Gna see B after that for lunch so yay!! :) He actually wants to meet my family and all.. Wow! How sweet is that.. :)

I'm sooo bored.. I dunno wut else to write cz lulu, yvonne n I are jz killing tym til our next class.. 45 more mins to go..

Neway, ima go now... *hugz* :)

"What have you done for me lately?"

2005-01-26T19:57:00.000-08:00

So i checked my friendster 4 days ago and i was surprised to see that i received 28 new msgs.. I then logged on the next day and again i got another 28 msgs! I logged off for like 5 minutes and then logged back on.. Damn! I received 22 new msgs, 6 fren requests and 1 testicle from sum1 i dunno.. The following day i logged on again and guess what.. Another 28 new msgs, 7 fren requests and 1 testicle from another sum1 i dunno.. Damn! Thats freaky but its also kinda cool.. :) Today, i got 22 new msgs, 1 friend request and a testi from sum guy i dunno agen.. Hmm...

So moving on..

Im in school at the moment killing time for my next lecture.. Its lunch.. Yea i noe.. Why am i not out for lunch? I just dun feel like driving.. I'm not hungry either.. But mostly coz i parked so close to my buliding and its in the shade so i dun 1a move or sum1 else myt take it.. So yea..

Oh so i was reading this girls blog the other day and she is sooo dissing us bruneians.. Damn girl! If u hate us so much den get the fuck outta Brunei aite..?! DUn go dissing us especially since ur still in our country.. And btw, that stuff u were complaining bout dun just happen in Brunei aite.. It happens everywhere... Even in ur own country.. Get over it!

I watched Raw again last nyt and i just cant stop laughing.. "you.. Cannnot.. say... 'Fuck'!!" Hahahha.. Eddie is so funny! So silly... "What have you done for lately?" Damn! He kills me.. His impressions are right on! :p "I don't see no ring on these fingers." Lolz..

So anyway, i have this test right after lunch.. Its sumthin to do with Theories and stuff.. I totally forgot all about it! Its a good thing Yvonne txtd me dis morning tho.. Thanx gurl! So i guess i gotta start cramming now.. :)

Laterz.. :)

In the memory of my beloved uncle Ak Khairol Hisham, 1986 - 2005.. (RIP)

2005-01-23T20:38:00.000-08:00

Its been awhile since i last updated.. But yea.. Things havent been going to well.. Before i start, lets all please give a moment of silence for my dear cousin/uncle who passed away last week..

Ak Khairol Hisham, aged 18, failed to return home after a fishing trip on Tuesday 18th January 2005.. His body was only found on Thursday 20th January 2005 at 2:10 am..

Due to the lack of help given by the police, family members and the police marine went to Muara beach to look for him.. The search started at around 8pm on Wednesday 19th January 2005..

Its kinda hard to write all this down so im gonna stop there..

I know that what im feeling right now doesn't even compare to how this dear family is feeling.. Awangku and his sister Nizan are my closest relatives from my dads side and i love them both so very much.. We grew up together.. They lived just a few houses away from us.. It used to be the four of us.. Awangku with my brother Hamdi, and Nizan with me.. I just cant believe that he's gone..

When i think about what's going on with the world today, it saddens me.. It makes me realize that there are bigger problems out there then what almost everyone is complaining about.. Myself included..

I guess there's nothing else to say.. Life is still life right.. No matter what we lose or who we lose, life still has to go on..

ThinkinThinkin*

2005-01-19T01:19:00.000-08:00

Hmm.. You know what? I think i will put everything down here.. I mean why not right? You guys obviously dun give a damn bout how feel right? Even though ive done nothing wrong.. So i should very well have the right to write down every single detail.. I don't care anymore.. The two of you can jz go to hell for all i care! But you know what, i wont.. Coz then Allah wont punish you for what you've done to me.. And i'd rather you get what you deserve from Allah than from me coz it'll be 10x worse than what i can do..

You know who you are

2005-01-18T08:51:00.000-08:00

You're such a fucking slut! It's girls like you who make other girls look cheap. Its girls like you who end up in the garbage! Its girls like you who end up in a whore house you fucking bitch! You know who the fuck you are and what the fuck you did.. So don't go crying to people asking why you deserve such treatment when you know damn right! Do you really wanna be labelled a whore at such a young age, bitch?

I'm sorry.. Did my back hurt your knife?

2005-01-17T18:54:00.000-08:00

~Hello~

Im sorry for all this trouble but i promise you that this is the absolute last time im moving.. I promise..

Eze told me to say that to a certain person.. He's such a sweety.. I dunno wut i'd do without him.. *hugz*

Ok, how do i feel? At the moment not so good.. But i wont mention why.. A lot of you who know me well enough will know why im feeling so fucked up.. So there's no need for me to explain my situation here.. Especially since its my 1st post..

Hmm.. Ok i guess there's nuthin much to say right now.. I have to go get ready for school..

Later..